Teachers should be on the lookout for students passing around a new forbidden, DVD that could twist their malleable minds.

The first few seasons of Sesame Street have been recently released.

And they carry a warning: "These … episodes of Sesame Street are intended for grownups and may not suit the needs of today's preschool child."

Huh? It's for grownups? Like grownups who can't spell?

Apparently the TV show that saved kids from such smart-as-rocks fare as the Three Stooges back in the '60s is dangerous to children today. The video equivalent of lawn darts.

On those early episodes we saw kids riding bicycles without helmets. Kids ran carefree through construction sites. The Cookie Monster had no concern for the caloric and fat content of what he ate (nor did he use hand sanitizer before cramming those cookies into his mouth without chewing an appropriate number of times). Oscar the Grouch was, well, always grouchy and we know there's nobody like that in the world.

The 1969 intro showed two kids wandering the streets of New York asking strangers "how you get to Sesame Street." Strangers! Eeeek!

Now the intro shows real kids interacting with computer-generated graphics of buildings and colourful landscapes, shifting and turning. It seems to have been developed in the '60s as well, the apparent result of a frat bong party.

No matter.

In 30 years it will be released with a warning that it is no longer appropriate for children, showing as it does puppets playing drums in an apartment building, another puppet talking out the car window while driving.

The new shows at that point will feature children in hazmat suits, rolled up in specially-sterilized mattresses doing, well, absolutely nothing.

At least Bert and Ernie should be married by then.